nama om vishnu-padaya krishna-preshthaya bhu-tale
srimate bhaktivedanta-svamin iti namine
namas te sarasvate deve gaura-vani-pracarine
nirvisesha-sunyavadi-pascatya-desa-tarine
Dear Srila Prabhupada,
Please accept my humble obeisances unto your lotus feet.
There is a quote that says:
Live without pretending
Hear without defending
Speak without offending (and)
Love without expecting
O Srila Prabhupada, you are the personification of this statement. Although you have lived these qualities all your life, please accept my humble offering as I share some of your pastimes which exemplify each of them.
It is said that a person’s character is defined by his behaviour when no one is watching him. It is quite easy to act like a devotee but very difficult to become one. Your life was the instruction of your spiritual master to spread the message of Lord Chaitanya in the western world and you lived solely for that purpose. You did not pretend to be a guru in order to fulfil some ulterior motives like desire for fame and prestige. When asked if you are the guru of the famous hippi sensation Allen Ginsberg, you instantaneously replied that “I am nobody’s guru. I am everybody’s servant. Actually I am not even a servant; a servant of God is no ordinary thing.” Your immediate response shows your natural humility.
In the courtyard of the Radha-Damodara temple, when the whole world was fast asleep, you would piteously cry for the mercy of Srila Rupa Goswami while sweeping the Samadhi.
When your western disciples first started visiting the house of Sri Advaita Acarya in Santipura, the pujari there narrated that a grihastha Bengali devotee used to come alone and quite often and used to chant there for many hours, sometimes with tears in his eyes. Then, for a very long time, he did not come. In August, 1965 he saw a saffron-clothed sanyasi chanting and weeping constantly. He recognised that it was the same person who used to come 10-20 years ago. Upon asking for his introduction, the man said that “My name is Abhaya Charanaravinda Bhaktivedanta Swami Maharaja. I am an unworthy disciple of His Divine Grace Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura, Srila Prabhupada, my divine master. I have been coming here for such a long time because my gurudeva has given me an impossible mission. His desire was for me to go across the ocean to the Western countries and spread the sublime teachings of Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu. There are countless souls there who have never heard of Sri Sri Radha-Krishna, and so they are suffering greatly. I have not known how this mission of his will be successful, so I have been coming here to this special house of Advaita Acharya, where He, Nityananda Prabhu, and Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu would gather together to plan the sankirtana movement. It was here that They launched the inundation of love of God that swept India and continues to this day. Thus I have been praying very earnestly here that They will all give me Their mercy that somehow They will empower me and guide me. I want to satisfy my gurudeva’s desire, but I am feeling unqualified to do this. Tomorrow I am leaving for Calcutta to go upon a ship across the ocean, to America. I do not know what will befall me there, but I am praying most earnestly here for help.” Thus, even when no one was watching you, your activities were the same which shows that you always lived without pretending.
When Mr. Mukherjee heavily insulted you in public for preaching in Christian countries, you simply heard his blasphemy and were not disturbed in the least. In fact, you again called for him to bless him. You humbly said that he took revenge from you for something from the previous life. In this way, you hear without defending yourself from personal insults but when Krsna or His devotees are blasphemed, you do not tolerate that.
Although your speech might seem harsh sometimes, but that doesn’t mean that you are offending. Just like a father sometimes speaks harsh words to discipline his son, similarly your chastisements are seen as your causeless mercy by your disciples. Despite that, in your last days, you very humbly asked for forgiveness from your disciples and godbrothers even though you always spoke without offending.
When a disciple of yours started smoking again, you asked to send the message that you will reject him if he doesn’t stop smoking. When asked again if you would really do that, you replied “No, I cannot reject anyone. The mercy of Lord Nityananda has no limit.” Another disciple of yours fell into bad association of bogus gurus and started doing some tricks in public to earn some money which was giving you and ISKCON a bad name. When advised that you should reject him your response was the same. Your love is the manifestation of the mercy of Nityananda Prabhu. Even though many of your disciples were not following your instructions, you did not withdraw your causeless mercy upon them which exemplifies your love without having any tinge of expectations.
Unless I turn 70 and go through 3 heart attacks at that age, only then I can begin to truly understand the price that you have paid to establish this movement.
Prabhupada, at the present moment, I’m really not sure of whatever I’m doing in the Krsna-consciousness movement, if it is really pleasing to you. But, if you are pleased with this insignificant offering, even just a little bit, please make me your humble instrument to execute your will and bless me with intelligence and determination required for the same.
Aspiring to be a servant of your servants
Hritik